Deaths Happen in Dozens not Threes

Deaths happen in threes they say. Well I think they happen in dozens. We are not even half way through 2010 and I've been to a funeral home probably more times that I can count on my fingers. I am really trying very hard to put my hope in Jesus. Really trying hard to make sense of some people's deaths that just happened within hours of each other. Dear Father, I know we lean on you during the times that we cannot make sense of why... right now I am just exhausted and I'm barely hanging on so please comfort me as well.
My heart is breaking for some young college girls who have grown up in our church. Their father was found dead by their grandmother. This precious grandmother is my neighbor. She lost her husband over a year ago and now she has lost her one and only son. As the day was ending I got a text on my phone from a co-worker telling me that she had heard something from her stepson. Now my heart is breaking for a part-time college kid who works where I am employed. His father had moved the rest of the family to Alabama. It was a work related move. Anyways, the father had just bought a motorcycle and he and his wife were riding it and were involved in a tragic accident which killed them both. Shocking is the not even the description of my comprehension of these tragic deaths. When deaths happen which just leave you speechless you wonder then what must the family be feeling? Oh God please comfort these children who are left behind to mourn for their mommy and daddy. Yes these kids are not little anymore but they are still kids just the same. Thank God for their grandparents who are going to be there for them!

Please, if you are reading my post, take this opportunity to know God more. Life on this earth should not be wasted on hurting others or yourself. Love deeply like Jesus did. Love people no matter what they've done to you. Love someone today, please? I will be loving up two families this week who will be lost in grief. As I end this post I do so with tears in my eyes but looking upward to heaven asking God to be with them all, one day at a time.

Finding Joy in Every Circumstance

The kids have been gone almost a week now back to their home in Virginia. I've not let myself cry over it but I think that's what happened to me last night. I had gone to bed to watch one of my favorite shows and fell asleep. Hubby was on the couch watching tv and had obviously fallen asleep too. Why do I know that? Well, I woke up to a very bad cramp in my left foot! And it would not let up! I began to scream out in pain and yell out to my hubby. SEVERAL TIMES I called his name and each time I got louder the pain got worse. I began to panic because I had all kinds of things cross my mind... I must have been kind of out of it but my thoughts were crazy! Oh, one more thing to add to the story is my hubby is leaving town soon for a business trip and I have not been ALONE in this house for quite some time. And the thought bothers me. I don't sleep well when he's not here. So with that said those thoughts I was having was flopping my emotions from anger to sadness, to self pity, to down right frustration! I thought to myself, "What if I was having a heart attack or something like a stroke and couldn't get out of this bed to get him? I would die right here and he would never know I was in distress..." And you know what? That scared me enough to jump right out of bed with that god forsaken cramped up foot. What do you know but it stopped cramping once I put my weight on it?!?!? I really felt stupid because here I was crying by eyes out in frustration because he was not hearing my panic sticken screams. He does have some hearing loss from years of working in a factory and the tv was on a little too loud but darn it I needed him and I needed him now.

I marched over to the couch and hit his shoulder with my hand as if to say - WAKE UP MISTER I'M IN PAIN AND YOU ARE GOING TO KNOW ABOUT IT! (I can laugh about this now but not last night!) So he asked me what was the matter and through my tears I think I said something like, "I've been writhing in bed for 10 minutes trying to get a cramp out of my foot and all the while yelling out your name and you didn't hear me! What if I would of had a heart attack or something? You would never know it and I'd be dead right now. Get a hearing aid! Or learn to turn that darn tv down when you are lying down knowing you will be falling asleep!"

Ugh! He tried to comfort me by telling me how sorry he was and I said it was ok that I just over reacted I guess because of all the things that have been happening in our life with one son and his family moving back with us for hte past 3 months; my young cousin dying; my dad's alzheimer's; mom's fragile health; then my other son and his family coming for a week then leaving and all of the dying and visiting/leaving happened in the same week~ I guess it was bound to get out of me somehow, huh?

Well, God is good and he spoke to me in some scriptures I've been reading in the book of Phillipians. I must remember that I need to remember God's gift of Joy and how wonderful it is. I can have a bad day/night but I don't need to waller in it right? Even through my pain I found Joy in just sharing my sillyness to everyone who wants to listen or read my story...

My commentary from my bible says this: Christians are to be joyful in every circumstance, even when things are going badly, even when we feel like complaining, even when no one else is joyful. Christ still reigns, and we still know him, so we can rejoice at all times... one day at a time!

God Answers Prayers

I recently wrote Easter and how my son has been looking for a home for he and his family. God answered prayers. Right after I wrote that blog they got a phone call about a house. And it's a really nice house. And the way it came about was really a God thing. Because of their short sell situation that they left in California to move back to Indiana, there was no way they would be able to just go get a loan from any bank. All the banks said they couldn't lend to them unless they had an enourmous amount of money for a down payment. These are twenty somethings, they have to money! Anyways, the realtor knew the owner of this new home and to make a long story short... the owner knew that my father in law (may he rest in peace) was good friends with the original owner of the Realty company the realtor works for. And because of this "friendship" that goes way back, the owner made Luke a great offer - yes he made Luke an offer!! Not the other way around. He wanted to help Luke and my dear daughter-in-law out and asked them for $1000 down payment. They agreed upon a monthly payment they could handle for the next 2 years and at the end of the 2 years they can then go get a loan from a bank to pay for the home. It's the best thing that could of happened to them and I prayed for this to happen and God answered! And it is the house that suits them both. I can't be happier that it has worked out this way. We all had a lot of things to learn about each other and I think God was working on all of us too! I think he taught me a lot about myself. I'm stronger than I know I am because I have learned to lean on Him and not myself. God is so good!

The Wind Beneath My Wings

When I was a young girl it seems life wasn't going anywhere fast. I was having a blast playing outside, riding a bicycle, playing baseball with my dad and siblings, making mud pies, running through the sprinkler on a hot and humid day... I could go on and on. But then you grow up and become responsible and you begin to think of others more.

We lived next door to my 5 girl cousins. We called them the T's: Teresa, Tina, Tammy, Tonya, and Twyla. I was Tina's age and we went through school together. My brothers went to school with Teresa and the other girls were a couple of years behind us. My dear sweet Teresa just lost her oldest daughter this past week. Her name was Tara. She was a light that always shined. Thirty-five years old ~ gone... She made some bad decisions in her youth and paid for those actions dearly. But in the end she gave life to the fullest and loved deeply those around her during her darkest days. She was baptised approximately 5 hours before she lost her battle. Her funeral was this past weekend. I always dread those things but am always blessed from the things that are said about the people who have just passed. She was an amazing artist. Both on the canvas and off. Remarkable talent! I feel so deeply sad for my cousin, Teresa, and her husband Phil and the youngest daughter, Trisha. You know the song, The Wind Beneath My Wings by Bette Midler? Well, that would describe the relationship between Trisha and Tara. Tara was the one with all the boyfriends...

Here is a pic of Tara - the only one I could find and I didn't know I had one! She has the sun glasses on. Teresa has on the black and white print shirt. Rest in Peace, Tara.